1. Any and all compliments can be handled by simply saying "Why, thank you".
  1. Some people are working backstage, some are playing in the orchestra, some are on stage singing, some are in the audience as critics and some are there to applaud. Know who and where you are.
  1. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas.
  1. When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste.
  1. Never continue dating anyone who is rude to the waiter and doesn't like dogs/cats.
  1. Good sex should involve laughter. Because think about it, it is funny.
  1. You need only two tools. WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't: use the duct tape.
  1. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship: “I apologize" and "You are right".
  1. Everyone seems normal until you get to know him or her.
  1. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm.
  1. The only really good advice that I remember my mother ever gave me was "Go! You might meet somebody!"
  1. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her--believe it.
  1. I've learned to pick my battles; I ask myself, Will this matter one year from now? How about one month? One week? One day?
  1. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.
  1. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!
  1. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right about you.
  1. Knowing how to listen to music is as great a talent as knowing how to make it.
  1. Work is good but it's not that important.
  1. Never underestimate the kindness of your fellow man.
  1. And finally... Be really nice to your friends. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.
For all you people who say, "I love you" when you have no clue what love is exactly! Something to ponder upon... 

---Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing and is your voice caught within your chest? It isn't love, it's        LIKE. 
---You can't keep your eyes or hands off of them, am I right? It isn't love, it's LUST. 
---Are you proud, and eager to show them off? It isn't love, it's LUCK.
--- Do you want them because you know they're there? It isn't love, it's LONELINESS.
---Are you there because it's what everyone wants? It isn't love, it's LOYALTY.
---Are you there because they kissed you, or held your hand? It isn't love, it's LOW CONFIDENCE.
--- Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don't want to hurt them? It isn't love, it's PITY. 
---Do you belong to them because their sight makes your heart skip a beat? It isn't love, it's INFATUATION.
---Do you pardon their faults because you care about them? It isn't love, it's FRIENDSHIP.
---Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of? It isn't love, it's a LIE.
--- Are you willing to give all of your favorite things for their sake? It isn't love, it's CHARITY.
---Does your heart ache and break when they're sad? Then it's LOVE.
---Do you cry for their pain, even when they're strong? Then it's LOVE
---.Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts? Then it's LOVE.
---Do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and relation pulls you close and holds you there? Then it's LOVE.
---Do you accept their faults because they're a part of who they are? Then it's LOVE.
--- Are you attracted to others, but stay with them faithfully without regret? Then it's LOVE.
---Would you give them your heart, your life, your death? Then it's LOVE.
Now, if love is painful, and tortures us so, why do we love? Why is it all we search for in life? This pain, this agony? Why is it all we long for? This torture, this powerful death of self? Why? The answer is so simple cause it's...LOVE. It is such an addictive thing that even people who are not having it wish to experience it and share it with others as well.  
    There was once a guy who suffered from cancer... a cancer that can't be treated. He was 18 years old and he could die anytime. All his life, he was stuck in his house being taken cared by his mother. He never went outside but he was sick of staying home and wanted to go out for once.  So he asked his mother and she gave him permission.  He walked down his block and found a lot of stores. He passed a CD store and looked through the front door for a second as he walked. He stopped and went back to look into the store. He saw a young girl about his age and he knew it was love at first sight. He opened the door and walked in, not looking at anything else but her. He walked closer and closer until he was finally at the front desk where she sat.   She looked up and asked "Can I help you?" She smiled and he thought it was the most beautiful smile he has ever seen before and wanted to kiss her right there.    He said "Uh... Yeah... Umm... I would like to buy a CD." He picked one out and gave her money for it.   "Would you like me to wrap it for you?" she asked, smiling her cute smile again.   He nodded and she went to the back.   She came back with the wrapped CD and gave it to him. He took it and walked out of the store. He went home and from then on, he went to that store everyday and bought a CD, and she wrapped it for him. He took the CD home and put it in his closet. He was still too shy to ask her out and he really wanted to but he couldn't. His mother found out about this and told him to just ask her.   So the next day, he took all his courage and went to the store. He bought a CD like he did everyday and once again she went to the back of the store and came back with it wrapped. He took it and when she wasn't looking, he left his phone number on the desk and ran out...    !!!RRRRRING!!!   The mother picked up the phone and said, "Hello?"   It was the girl!!! She asked for the boy and the mother started to cry and said, "You don't know? He passed away yesterday...   "  The line was quiet except for the cries of the boy's mother. Later in the day. The mother went into the boy's room because she wanted to remember him. She thought she would start by looking at his clothes. So she opened the closet. She was face to face with piles and piles and piles of unopened CDs. She was surprised to find all those CDs and she picked one up and sat down on the bed and she started to open one.    Inside, there was a CD and as she took it out of the wrapper, out fell a piece of paper. The mother picked it up and started to read it.   It said:  Hi... I think U R really cute. Do u wanna go out with me? Love, Jacelyn    The mother opened another CD...   Again there was a piece of paper. It said:  Hi... I think U R really cute. Do u wanna go out with me? Love, Jacelyn    Love is... when you've had a huge fight but then decide to put aside your ego, hold hands and say, "I Love You………..”



    Written with a pen... Sealed with a kiss...If you are my friend,.. Please answer this: Are we friends or are we not? You told me once, but I forgot... So tell me now and tell me true,.. So I can say, I am here for you... Of all the friends I've ever met,... You're the one I won't forget... And if I die before you do,.. I'll go to Heaven (I’m sure I’m)... And wait for you.


           It's Up To You!

    One song can spark a moment,
    One flower can wake the dream.
    One tree can start a forest,
    One bird can herald spring.

    One smile begins a friendship,
    One handclasp lifts a soul.
    One star can guide a ship at sea,
    One word can frame the goal.

    One vote can change a nation,
    One sunbeam lights a room.
    One candle wipes out darkness,
    One laugh will conquer gloom.

    One step must start each journey,
    One word must start each prayer.
    One hope will raise our spirits,
    One touch can show you care.

    One voice can speak with wisdom,
    One heart can know what's true.
    One life can make the difference,
    You see, IT'S UP TO YOU! 



    ---The most damaging one letter word:                   I,          Avoid it.
    ---The most satisfying two-letter word:                WE     Use it.
    ---The most poisonous three-letter word:      EGO, Kill it.
    ---The most used four-letter word:                     LOVE,       Value it.
    ---The most pleasing five-letter word:             SMILE, Keep it.
    ---The fastest spreading six-letter word: RUMOUR, Ignore it.
    ---The most enviable seven-letter word:           SUCCESS, Achieve it.
    ---The most nefarious eight-letter word:         JEALOUSY, Distance it.
    ---The most powerful nine-letter word:           KNOWLEDGE, Acquire it.
    ---The most essential ten-letter word:             CONFIDENCE, Trust it.